It's finally happening. The day that I've been waiting for since February is here. Throughout these past months this opportunity has just been something that's coming up and I think I've been fairly neutral about the whole situation. Now, more than ever, I have no idea what to expect. Everyone I've talked to says that it's going to be amazing and I'm going to have a fantastic time. I believe them, but the feeling I have right now is unsettling. I just want to get there, sit there on my dorm bed, and then fully understand what the hell I have gotten myself into. I think it's going to be a good but scared shitless feeling.
I was telling someone today that during this process to date, I've realized what a control freak I am. Even packing something as simple as toothpaste could include a calculation and consultation (ask Andrea). I hope that I can work on this over the next 4 months.
I wish this were like another conference. To a certain degree, this is what I'm feeling... that I'll be back in 1-4 weeks. But it's different b/c there is no organizing committee there to receive me on the other end. It's unpredictable, I don't know whether the place I'll be living is decent, the people I meet could be 110 times different from me. There'll be a chance for me to settle into culture shock. I wonder whether I'll even be able to fit into the clothes there... and I'm definitely not willing to gain 30 lbs (contrary to what Sean or Gbutt says) or else all the work this summer was not worth it.
So here I sit my last time for the next few months on my bed, with 5 hours to go before I have to wake up again. My head is silent yet buzzing at the same time... I guess all that there's left to think is: "Ready. Set. Go".
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